No two rock bottoms are the same. The point where we decide that we simply cannot keep hurting ourselves looks different for everyone. This is important because some of us struggle with our perception of what alcoholism looks like.
The other night, I took the dog outside before bed and looked up into the stars. An overwhelming feeling struck me in the chest. I felt the immense power of God, the creator of the universe and I was staring right into His creation. It was all right there. And instead of feeling small and insignificant, I felt a connection to what God created out there and knew that it was in… Read More
I think of myself as a numbaholic, prone to disengaging in not-so-healthy ways. Alcohol was by far my favorite way to numb but I still have others. Food, immersing myself in books, playing Angry Birds, keeping busy, cleaning (maybe this one isn’t so bad), reading blogs, over-spending, picking at my cuticles…these are all ways that I numb myself.
We recently got a dog who narrowly escaped being named Grover by my 4 year old. He’s a year old rescue dog with a gentle energy who is completely unfazed by the chaos of our home. I thought it was going to be a big adjustment but it turns out that it’s just like having another preschooler in the house. Fortunately, he seems to be easier to train than the kids.
Dear Heather, I read your book, Sober Mercies: How Love Caught Up With a Christian Drunk. I finished it a couple of weeks ago and have been thinking about it ever since. I laughed, I cried, I related. It wasn’t my story but like all the stories I’ve heard of people in recovery, it was close enough. The details of our drinking are different but our stories have the same theme. We… Read More
My daughter, who is almost 3, comically controls her universe. If I scold her, she stamps out my words by saying, “Stop talking! Stop talking!” If I give her a disapproving look, she responds by closing her eyes so that she can’t see me. My son, on the other hand, is 4 ½ and developing a conscience. He can’t tolerate disapproval and will often respond with, “I want you to be dead… Read More
I recently celebrated my first year of being a Christian. It felt a lot like my first year of not drinking. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out what it all means, trying the label “Christian” on for size and getting used to the vernacular (or as Dr Evil would say, I don’t “sprechen sie the same lingidy.”). I’m a very awkward Christian.
A year and a half ago, I made a big, scary, necessary change in my life. It feels like forever ago and just yesterday at the same time. There’s something about marking a half-iversary that’s more personal than celebrating an anniversary. It’s a halfway point between where I was 6 months ago and where I might be 6 months from now. There are no expectations of a big celebration, no pats on the… Read More
We took an impromptu trip to Agua Caliente on New Year’s Day, the park’s name mocking us as we shivered in the 42 degree weather. The kids had been cooped up in the house for days because when you grow up in the desert, this is really cold. We only intended to drive around for a while but the kids begged us to let them out. Children rarely give obvious warnings that their energy is… Read More