Odds and Ends

Blog? What’s a blog? Oh yeah, that thing that used to call to me like a longing lover at least once a week. Sorry honey, I just haven’t been feeling it.

My little guy turned 6 and we had our first parent/teacher conference. He’s totally rocking kindergarten. My heart dropped a little when his teacher pointed out that he’s very hard on himself but that he seems to be finding his groove and relaxing. My mind wanted to sabotage me with thoughts like he’s hard on himself because I’m hard on myself. I taught him to be that way. Isn’t that just like a recovering perfectionist? Fortunately, there was another voice in my head, a stronger, more loving voice that said you’re such a good mama for recognizing his tendency to be hard on himself and showing him what self-compassion looks like. His teacher has no idea that his mama is uniquely qualified to help him kick perfectionism in the b-u-t-t.

We said our teary goodbye to the minivan.

Sad-goodbye-to-the-minivan face.

Sad-goodbye-to-the-minivan face.

Happy-Jeep-face.

Happy-Jeep-face.

 

The kids are on fall break this week, which means we’re enjoying the high 80’s and absolutely nothing resembling fall. We did get some rain last week, which inspired me to replace all of the sleeveless tops in my closet with my winter wardrobe. I’ll be sweating it out until December, folks.

rain

There’s nothing like the smell of desert rain.

 

I’ve been taking a lot of selfies.

selfie b (1)

Hams.

 

Two lovely ladies, Dawn and Joyelle, are creating an anthology to create awareness for parents who are survivors of childhood sexual and physical abuse. I’m working on an essay to contribute and want to help spread the word to others who may be interested in contributing. You can get all the details on their Facebook page – https://www.facebook.com/TriggerPointsAnthology

There’s a pretty good chance that I won’t be posting much. I’m really enjoying just living in the present and I haven’t been feeling much like analyzing the past. That’s a big change for me and I’m going to ride it out. If we get what we focus on, I’m focusing on my state of wholeness. I don’t have to convince myself that I’m whole, I just have to remember. God made me whole. He always intended for me to be whole. I’m living like I already know the end of the book.

 

25 Comments on “Odds and Ends

  1. Follow your heart Karen- that’s all you can do. We’ll be here when you feel the need to talk to us. Be well.

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  2. We go where we are nudged, Karen. At least, we do our best to listen to that wee voice that pushes use where He would have us be, even if we don’t know what is going to happen next. So I get it. I am bummed you won’t be posting much, and surely you are in a different place now than where you were before, on all planes. For many, blogging is a phase of growth and introspection and of sharing. I don’t imagine people can blog like that forever. I think we hit the point where it no longer serves us and we move onto something that does. The good news (or maybe not good news, depending on how you look at it!) is that it’s always going to be there. I am sure that your older posts will move and help others as they already have before.

    I have been feeling something shift for me as well, and while I would keep my own blog up for others to read old posts, I think there will be a point where I too will shift and morph into another way of expressing myself and sharing what I have. As we all do, and as you are doing now. And that’s a wonderful thing.

    I will certainly jump on any posts you do grace us with in the future, as sparse as they may be, and in the meantime, be kind to yourself and blessings to you and your lovely family 🙂

    Paul

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    • Nudged…that’s exactly it. I feel like I’m being nudged to get out from behind the screen, to not hold on so tight to the labels I identify with (blogger, survivor, etc) and just live what I’ve been cultivating these last few years. I knew that it was the right direction when I stopped thinking in blog paragraphs and my thoughts flowed wordlessly. Thank you for the encouragement Paul! It means the world to me. 🙂

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  3. I look at my kids and wonder how much of them is me… however one is doing a PhD and close to getting his first academic paper published and the other is cracking on with a degree in Psychology… so they may be “worriers”, “procrastinators” and even voiced their own concerns about “addictive behaviours” but… there’s a lot better than worse and also they are themselves and again that is good and bad. So I try not to focus on the bits I’d like them to change just because I consider it a bad trait of mine… easy said… so bloody hard to do

    Oh – come to England, we have Autumn in spades here… grey verging on black skies, fog, rainfall off the chart, wind, leaves… blah blah! 🙂

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    • It is hard to do. It seems that as parents we take blame far easier than we take credit. Maybe we aren’t meant to take too much of either. Fall in England sounds lovely! I’d probably be complaining in a week but it would be wonderful to experience a real season. 🙂

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  4. I don’t have to convince myself that I’m whole, I just have to remember. What a powerful statement,I need to remember that, too.

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  5. So good to hear your voice, Karen. And to know that you are anchoring into a place of wholeness. Thank you for your heart and spirit and blessings to you as you offer a tender goodbye to your past traumas. May they inform, but not haunt your present and future.

    With heart,
    Dani

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  6. Your last paragraph is completely perfect. It makes my heart happy to see you at this place…and, it makes me want to go visit that same place as well.

    AND, I think you should use paratag in your next post…whenever that may be 🙂

    My dear Karen, you inspire me. Thank you for a very timely post. xo

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  7. Good, no, great to hear from you! AND, I’m totally along for the ride, even if that means you won’t be writing for a bit. GO WITH IT. Totally. I love that you are doing what you are called to do in the moment and it inspires me. Sending love and laughter.
    Marie

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    • Thank you for the love and support! The only hard part about not blogging as much is that I’m not reading other blogs as much. I need to do better at keeping up with my besties. Love to you Marie!

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  8. That last paragtag made me happy and sad all at the same time. Happy for you, because life is good for you and you seem to be relishing that. Sad for me because I will miss your posts.

    Keep enjoying the privilege of life 🙂

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